Choosing a Counsellor or Psychotherapist

When you’re struggling with anxiety, low mood, depression, or emotional distress, knowing where to seek help can feel surprisingly difficult. Many people worry about choosing the wrong therapist — or investing emotionally only to find it doesn’t feel right.

This uncertainty is very common, especially when you’re already feeling overwhelmed.

Do qualifications matter?

Counsellors, psychotherapists, and psychologists often work in similar ways, and from a client’s perspective the experience of being in the room may not feel dramatically different. Most sessions last around 50 minutes, and involve being listened to carefully, exploring what’s going on for you, and finding ways to understand and respond differently to difficulties.

Qualifications do matter — they tell you that someone has trained properly, works ethically, and is accountable to a professional body. However, qualifications alone don’t tell you how it will feel to work with someone.

What matters most

One of the strongest indicators of helpful therapy is the quality of the relationship. Feeling heard, understood, and respected is often more important than the specific title a therapist holds.

It can be helpful to ask yourself:

• Do I feel listened to?

• Do I feel safe enough to be honest?

• Does this feel like a collaborative process rather than being “done to”?

Therapy works best when it feels like you and the therapist are working together, at a pace that suits you.

The importance of experience and specialism

While many therapists work with a broad range of issues, it can be helpful to look at a practitioner’s areas of experience. If you’re seeking help for something specific — such as anxiety, trauma, relationship difficulties, or obsessive thoughts — working with someone familiar with these issues can reduce frustration and help therapy feel more focused.

If therapy doesn’t seem to be helping, this doesn’t mean you’ve failed — it may simply mean the approach or fit isn’t right for you. A good therapist will be open to discussing this.

Where to start your search

A good place to begin looking for a counsellor in the UK is the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP). Their online directory allows you to search by location, specialism, and type of therapy, and ensures that therapists listed meet professional and ethical standards.

Trust your experience

It’s okay to take your time choosing a therapist, and it’s okay to ask questions before committing. Therapy isn’t about finding someone with the “right answers” — it’s about finding someone you feel able to work with.

If you leave an initial session feeling uncertain but somewhat understood, that can be a perfectly valid place to start.